In moments when the world seems to crumble around us, grief becomes a collective experience. Natural disasters like the recent fires in LA and surrounding areas bring devastation that feels incomprehensible. Homes reduced to ashes, treasured possessions lost forever, and communities uprooted in an instant—the impact is staggering. Even for those watching from afar, the pain resonates deeply. We grieve for the people affected, often feeling paralyzed by the enormity of the loss and unsure of how to help.
We have felt this in our community within the past 5 years with a 100 year flood that destroyed homes and parts of the community. This past Spring, our community was devastated by a tornado that left no mercy. Myself and my direct family were not affected by these natural disasters, but I sat back watching feeling with utter guilt and helplessness. We all felt it when Covid hit; everyone's lives were changed and how we lived was changed forever.
Traumatic grief like this, born from events beyond our control, has its own unique challenges. It demands a different kind of resilience and a path forward that honors both the enormity of the loss and the capacity for healing. Here are some steps to navigate this type of grief, whether you’re directly affected or standing in solidarity with those who are:
Acknowledge the Depth of the Loss
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For those directly impacted: Allow yourself to feel the weight of what’s been lost. Whether it’s your home, possessions, or sense of safety, grief is a natural response to such upheaval. Give yourself permission to mourn without judgment.
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For those watching from a distance: Recognize that your grief is valid too. Witnessing such devastation can stir feelings of helplessness, empathy, and sadness. Honor those emotions instead of dismissing them as "less than."
Seek Community and Connection
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Rebuild together: For survivors, community can be a lifeline. Whether it’s leaning on family and friends, joining support groups, or participating in local recovery efforts, connection reminds you that you’re not alone.
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Offer your presence: For those wanting to support, sometimes the simplest acts make the biggest difference. A kind message, a donation, or volunteering time to relief efforts are all meaningful ways to show you care.
Focus on Small Steps Forward
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Break it down: Recovery can feel overwhelming. Focus on what you can do today—whether it’s contacting an insurance company, salvaging belongings, or simply eating a meal. Small victories build momentum.
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For supporters: Encourage and celebrate these small steps. Practical help, like offering to run errands or assist with paperwork, can ease the burden.
Create Space for Emotional Healing
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Make room for grief: Healing is a process, not a destination. Journaling, therapy, or even moments of quiet reflection can help process emotions.
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Show empathy: For those on the outside, validate the grief of survivors without trying to "fix" it. Phrases like, “I’m here for you,” or “Your feelings are valid,” can offer comfort.
Find Meaning Amid the Loss
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Honor what was lost: While possessions and homes can often be replaced, their sentimental value cannot. Consider ways to honor these losses, such as creating a memory book or dedicating a space to reflect.
- For supporters: Help survivors find moments of hope by sharing stories of resilience, offering to create keepsakes, or simply standing by them as they rebuild.
Take Action to Help—Even from Afar
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Donate to reputable relief organizations.
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Share verified fundraisers or recovery efforts on social media.
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Advocate for policies that support disaster relief and prevention.
Moving Forward Together
Traumatic grief reminds us of life’s fragility and the resilience of the human spirit. While the pain of loss is undeniable, so too is our ability to rebuild and support one another. Whether you’re walking through the ashes of devastation or standing with those who are, moving forward is possible—one small step at a time. Let’s hold space for each other, offering hope and compassion in the face of the unimaginable.